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Hello friends and family,

Mother. Is there another word that elicits such emotion?

I am blessed to have a wonderful relationship with my mother. From the time I was a little girl, writing poems to her, through my teen years when I thought she was perhaps the meanest mother in the world, to my early adulthood, when I would look to her for advice on raising my own children, to now, as I watch her lovingly, patiently, selflessly taking care of my father – my mother has always been a source of comfort, inspiration, advice, and love.

Of all the things she taught me, I think the most important thing my mother taught me was to help those who needed help.  All while I was growing up, my mother worked as an R.N. at the low-cost community clinic in our time. She treated all her patients with dignity and love – the drug addicts, the prostitutes, the welfare mothers, the mentally ill, the homeless. Any one who walked through the doors of the clinic received the same excellent care.

From my mother I learned to accept people for who they are, to look past outward appearances to the person within, to give respect and dignity to all. Like her, I cannot tolerate meanness, cruelty and prejudice.

Later in my life I was blessed with another mother, my husband’s mother. Unlike other people I knew, my mother-in-law and I had a wonderful relationship. I admired her strength, raising two boys by herself without much family support and in a time when divorce wasn’t as common as it is now. She worked hard to provide for her sons, putting her own wants and needs behind theirs until they were grown.  Although she found it difficult to ask for help for herself, she was always the first one to volunteer to help a family member or a friend in need.

Although she never had the means to travel, my mother-in-law was an avid armchair traveler, reading books and watching shows about many exotic places. She kept up-to-date on all the things going on in the world, and was quite knowledgeable about history – a trait she passed on to both her sons. She never thought she was smart, but she was one of the most well-informed people I know. Unfortunately, she passed away a year ago in April, and not a day goes by that I don’t miss her somewhat sarcastic New-Yorker humor and wonderful cooking!

Now that I am a grandmother, I am constantly amazed with the wonderful mothers my daughters have become. Like their grandmothers, my daughters are strong, resilient, uncomplaining women who love their children and do the best they can under less-than-ideal conditions. I am proud of the women they have become.

Perhaps the traits I so admire in my mother and mother-in-law are the traits I admire in all the women in my family. They are strong, capable, stubborn, nurturing, giving, empathetic. They are the ones who are willing to reach out, compromise, find a solution. They see what needs to be done and find a way to get it done. They keep the family together, are the conduits of communication, the jugglers of schedules. They are healers.  They’ve had to deal with heartache, heartbreak, illness, poverty, loss of children, loss of spouses – and yet, each woman in my family has found strength – in God, in themselves, in friendship, in family, and has been able to keep going, continue to live, love and laugh.

So although this is Mother’s Day, I propose two toasts to all the women in my life. “Na zdrowie!” and “Sláinte chuig na fir, agus go mairfidh na mná go deo.”

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